A For Attitude
"My attitude is to live and let live. Usually people think that I am a happy-go-lucky type, easy to handle, unless someone crosses me on the wrong foot. More than getting angry (I don't get angry that often, I think I dread my own anger), I get irritated. Some people just bring out the negative emotions in you. Then, being a rational person, I tell myself that there are only two ways to handle the situation - get to the root of the problem and fight it out, and I am the world's biggest and best fighter (ha, ha, ha). I can sit down with the person and give it off to him. I don't hit below the belt, I just put it the way it is, very clearly and nicely that, 'Look, this is the problem. Back off.' But, if I feel that by doing this I'll make the situation worse, then I put a big, steel wall in front of me which the person can't cross. I'll be cordial and nice, but then I completely cut off. You see, it's very tough for me to uncross a line once I've crossed it because then your ego comes in the way. However, it's not as if I have a king-sized ego, but you feel really stupid to backtrack once you've made your point."
B For Bitchiness
"I have to say I am not an angel with a halo around my head. Of course I bitch about people. But, that bitchiness is limited to very girlie kind of bitching, like, 'Look at those shoes' or 'This one thinks he's this' or 'That one thinks she's that.' Beyond that, I think I am too self-obsessed, in the sense my friends and I are too much into our own world to be seriously bitching about people. When we do bitch, there's a lot of humour in our bitching. Like, when my best friend Suzy and I are watching TV, and when we spot the ugliest guy, I'll say, 'See your future.' And then she'll go ugghhh. So we make fun of people, which is not good but then it makes us laugh."
C For Competition And Controversies
"It's good that there is competition because now the level of competitiveness has changed. My competitors are everybody and at the same time nobody because I am different. For sure, in Hindi films we are interchangeable, but the way, for instance, I can do a role, Rani cannot do it and vice versa, or the way Ash (Aishwarya Rai) can do it, I can't do it. Competition shouldn't be such that because I am in a movie with another actress, I go home and b*tch about her, her mother, her family and start creating stories about her, or make fun of her physically with sleazy comments about her in magazines. The way people talk, the way they carry themselves, it reflects the bottomline - their upbringing. There is a phrase in Hindi which when translated into English means, 'If there's a small door, and if you have to bend to go through it, you don't become small'.
It's happenend to me two-three times when people have made unwarranted comments about me. It has irritated me. Initially I might have reacted like, 'Who does she think is and brrrrrr......' But then when I am calmer, I let it go. Kareena's comments on me? Well, that was ages ago. I don't even know if she said it because there are so many times you get misquoted. But if she di, it's her way of expressing herself.
Look, someone will only talk about me if I matter to them somewhere. Why don't I talk about anybody? Because genuinely they don't matter to me. I am too invovled in what's happening in my life. My friends are out of films. Also, you see, I have minimum contact with the film industry. It's limited to people I am working with in the films I am doing. After pack-up I don't even call anybody unless I have forgotten a continuity or something. That's it. I disconnect from the industry by just switching off my phone. And I am the toughest person for anybody to get, anyways."
D For Dil Chahta Hai
"I love that movie. I think it was like a college holiday. We had lots of fun. I think it's the first time in the history of Indian cinema that a film is depicting the urban Indian youth the way they are without extra gloss attached to them, without commercialism attached to them, ki heroine hai, so she should be dressed like this, or let's have an item song or a rain dance... There is no formula for DCH. Our dates were taken almost two years in advance. In DCH, I wear almost no make-up. Styled hair, but no eye lashes, it used to take me about eight minutes to get dressed."
E For Envy
"Envy is not an alien term to me. When I am watching Baywatch, and I see those mindblowing figures, I go with envy, 'God, why them and why not me.....' But closer to home, more than envy, in terms of adulation, I'll tell you what I admire in other actresses. I l-o-v-e the way Ash (Aishwarya Rai) dances. I keep looking at her wide-eyed and wonder how she does it. I don't think there's any person in the world who can say she can't dance well. She is the epitome of grace. Then Hrithik. You just keep looking at him when he's dancing and wonder, 'How do you do it, man.' Then, the way certain people act in certain films - not in all their films. I loved the way Ajay (Devgan) acted in Hum Dil De Chuke Sanam, now Aamir (Khan) in Lagaain. The girl - Gracy Singh - who plays Gauri in Lagaan, was fantastic in the film, absolutely incredible! When I saw the film, I sat through it absolutely dumbstruck. When it got over, I told myself this is history. From a point of us stagnating in the industry, with Lagaain, we've taken a big leap forward.
See, I was also one of the many girls Aamir considered for Lagaan. We'd talked about it, etc. But after I saw Lagaain, I went straight to Aamir and told him that girl was brilliant (she was sitting there, I didn't see her; later of course I felt awkward and embarrassed). I also told him that I was so glad I did not do Lagaan because what Gracy added o the filme, I couldn't ever have added. I would have carried the excess baggage of Preity Zinta, the star. People would have come with the expectation of watching an Aamir-Priety film. There are certain roles you need to unlearn for. I would have had to unlearn the concept of stardom for this role. Gracy did so much for Lagaan. She didn't stadn out like a sore thumb. It was wow. You know, I can show Lagaan to any of my friends overseas and say this is a good indian film. I can show DCH to anyone too. I can show Sholay too."
F For Flirting
"I do flirt, it's not that I don't. But, I am not an outrageous flirt. Also, it's not wise to flirt with my co-stars. I don't flirt with anything that's related to work. But otherwise, ofcourse I flirt. I am single now, so when I see someone attractive, it's not as if I go up to him and make eyes at him, but I'll talk to him and feel good about it. But no, I don't like anybody coming too close for comfort. I'll be very nice, but I'll put him in his place. Like, once at a party, this guy came up and said I've got such nice hair and he touched my hair. My blood pressure shot up to 2000! I just looked at him and told him, 'Never touch a woman when she does not want to be touched.' He just curled up. I was like, 'Don't decide for me what I want. That's basic chivalry. I'm not asking you to open the door for me.' He felt so insulted. He froze and so did everybody else. They were all like, 'Preity, how could you be so direct?' I explained to them that I was very polite. I didn't get melodramatic and scream, 'Stay away.' I didn't fight with him either, or call the bouncers to throw him out. I did it very nicely and clearly, and he got the message. So that way I am full on, I say phataphat what I have to."
G For Gossip
"I do gossip. I have always maintained with the media that if there is somethign that is five, since it's your job, you blow it out of proportion and make it seven. Not all do this, I agree. But, what happens is, one person writes something, then all of them pick if up. Like, there is not an iota of truth in this gossip about Sanjay Dutt and me. Thankfully, this has not affected my equation with him. I adore him, he's such a great guy. I just felt a little weird because his wife, Rhea, got dragged into it. And I think the media shoudl respect all the actors' wives because they are in very delicate postions. For sure, if the guy is doing his own thin, then don't ignore it. See, one has to be responsible for the acts that you do. If you do something, then claim ownership to it. I don't believe in being slimy. I believe in a saying that you shouldn't lie because everytime you lie, you change the past. I will avoid a conversation about a situation, but I won't lie about it.
But this Sanjay thing really pissed me off. Even our temperaments are so different, and he treats me like a kid, you know. He always goes, 'Yackoo Kiddo, what's up.' He just ruffles my hair, etc. It became very werid. You know, even when I turn 100 years old, till I die I'll maintain it was rubbish news because it is. I am one person in the industry who has said it the way it is. If I am seeing someone, I say yes I am, but stay out of it because it's my life. So please guys give me that respect. But when I am not seeing someone and you link me with him, I am ready to claw you."
H For Hyprocrisy
I can detect it, if I have proof that someone's done or said something, then I chew the person up alive. I say it right to the face, the way it is. I'm outspoken, for sure.
I don't believe in b*tching about the person behind his back and then saying all nice things about him to his face. The strongest weapon for anyone to have is the weapon of honesty. If I don't like someone, and he asks me why don't I talk to him, I'll just say I don't like him and that I don't get good vibes from him. That's why I think people think I'm arrgoant, that I am too big for my boots. But I am telling the truth, man.
It's not that I am waving a flag to proclaim that I am honest. I do speak white lies. Where it really matters - in my biggest situations - I've been stark honest. Being honest helps because then when you are in the middle of a situation, you can hold on to that honesty and figure everything out. You need to be at one place and figure everything out. If you are lying, you are never stable. You didn't know where you are. Plus, honesty always helps because with people who matter and who care for you, you don't want to risk your equation with them. You just put it all out on the table, say sorry, that you screwed up this time. It's not a big deal to say sorry. You may feel humiliated to a point, but it eventually helps."
I For Instinct
"I am extremely instinctive. And it has me so many time from situations and things. When my instinct tells me 'No, don't do this', I've backed out of it last minute giving excuses that I don't want to go, or that I am not interested. Also, when I look at a person, I can tell instinctively, whether I can trust the person or not. It's just the vibes I got.
Maybe I've got sharper instincts because I've learnt psychology. I did a lot of case studies. There are people I meet for the first time and I hit if off instantly with them. Like, when you go for a holiday, and you meet people and you end up making a big group and half of them are just hanging out with you. But you are comfortable with them at an instinctive level and you end up having the most amazing holiday.
then ther are people I've et whom I've not liked from the word go. And I've been right. There's not been one time in my life when my instincts have let me down. Why, even in films that I have not wanted to do, I don't. I feel the set-up is not working for me; it's not the script, not the money either, but something tells me that I am going to regret doing the film. So I don't."
K For Karma
"I believe in karma, for sure. What goes around, comes around. I've experienced it first hand. Whatever you do, comes back to you. I think in my previous life I must have been a thief because I lose so many things, or they get stolen from me. I got mugged in London, in America I lost my wallet, etc. I think I owned those people in my previous life.
Also, it's so strange, it's all here. Same situation, same dialogue, same attitude, it's just history repeating itself. But it's another time and the roles are reversed. And then you just stand there adn tell yourself, 'My God, this is not happening.' This has happened too many times with me. So I believe in Karma.
Also I believe that the human will is so strong that if you will a lot of negative, it will be and viceversa. Thankfully I've been extremely postive all my life. I'm really happy I'm like that."
L For Love & Lust
"I don't believe in lust at first sight. That's a very shallow and stupid feeling. That's not my kind of thing. I don't believe in love at first sight either. I believe in interaction, chemistry to a point, compatibility, but not love or lust at first sight because everything grows. At 16 I might have believed in all of that. But now I have seen too much of the world, done too many things to fall for it. Also, the kind of profession that I am in, there's so much awareness, so many openings for me - I travel, I see so many things - that now my perspective has changed. But nothing holds me back from falling in love or doing anything, no even the fact that I am a star. In fact, teh day I start treating myself as a star, I'll destroy myself completely.
Love for me is being completely easy with the person, just being myself. Somebody whome I am in love with has to be my friend, my companion, my enemy, my family. He has to be everything to me. At the same time, he doesn't have to be in my face all the time. Love is all about a person making you feel complete and happy. He doesn't necessarily have to be tall, dark and handsome. But he has to speak well, have basic intelligence. Out of all the senses, the most important is common sense. And common sense can make you do anything.... properly."
M For Mom, Money, Marriage
"I love my mom. She's so cool. She's really nice. She's like my best friend. She's very dignified, very cool. No, I take after my dad. I wish I was a bit more elegent, like my mom. There was a time when I was trying to be very cool and sophisticated. But now I have given up. Though, I have my own personality. I could say my mom is very royal, propah, soft. Two days ago she called me up and shared with me a funny incident that happened with her. Somebody probably punched in the wrong cell number and so she recieved a written message on her cell - 'All the animals in the forest had a meeting. But itgot cancelled because the monkey was busy reading mail.' And I died laughing, it was so cute. Like me, my mom is also like a child at times.
Like My mom, I cook really well. I am very good with the house. In my worst situations, like my mom, I can be very calm, silent and thoughtful.
People who've seen me go through the bad situations in my life tell me, 'Preity, we never thought you'd be like this.' At that point, you could have done the worst thing to me, but I'll put it on hold and concentrate on the situation on hand and excerise damage control. But, in-the-not-so worse situations, I'm extremely impulsive.
People say money is not important, it is to me. I am not saying it's the most important thing, but money is extremely important. I never want to be a broke ex-film star, ever. But, it's not the be-all and end-all either. My survival is very basic. But money is important because you don't know what's going to happen next. So I do know one thing, that at any stage in my life I want to be financially independent.
Marriage? Umm.... one, marriage is for keeps, and two, the minute I get married, I want to have a family. I won't get married till I want to have a family. And no, I don't believe in a long-distance marriage. I will leave my job. I want to have a new life. Marriage will be another chapter in my life. The first seven years of having children is the most important because that's when children develop their basic personality. Therefore, it's very important that I am there for my kids.
For sure, the person I marry must have an identity of his own, a place of his own in the sun. As much as love is important, the male ego is so big that me cannot handle a woman doing better. Men have to have their own identity, otherwise it starts to reflect negatively on the relationship.... like Abhimaan. The society is male dominated. Somtimes he may not think so, but his friends would, people outside would start saying things. So it's important that the guy is doing extremely well for himself so that he does not begin to feel 'oh poor me' at some stage in the marriage because after some time in a marriage, the rose-tinted glasses get clear. So you have to be with someone who can handle it all. Only someone who'se seen that kind of life can handle it. For someone who hasn't, it's tough."
N For Narcissicim
I think every actor somewhere down the line is a narcissist. There's not been a time when I've spotted a mirror and not looked into it. Once, during an interview, this TV journalist was being really cocky with me. He began interacting with me as if I was this silly, idiotic actress and he was this intellectual guy. He told me I was like a 19-year-old who never wanted to grow up. Then he asked me, 'Don't you think actors are narcissists? They just keep looking in the mirror all the time.' I said, 'Yeah, sure. But there are two kinds of people. One, who look into the mirror, and the other, who hold the mirror. I'd rather be the one to look into the mirror.' He just looked into my face and said, 'Oh yeah.' So I gave it back to him nicely. At te end of it he said that he had never had so much interactivity, so much fun on the show before.
Gosh, it's my job to look into the mirror and see that I'm looking awright. I get paid for it. Besides, you are constantly looking at yourself on screen and reviewing yourself, your looks, your appereance. This is a narcissistic quailty, you know. But, when I am on a holiday, when I am relaxed, then you will see me just the way I am. I'll have no make-up on unless I have to for a big function. Besides, my screen image is also not of a sexy icon that I have to be dolled up all the time for the sake of my image. In fact, people usually comment that I look nicer the way I am in real life than on screen."
Q For Quiz Shows
"Yeah, I was approached by TV Channels to do a couple of quiz shows. But, it isn't my cup of tea because you get tied down every month and you are bound. I don't think I want to do that."
R For Rani Mukerji
"The media has blown Rani and my friendship out of proportion. We worked very well together as co-star, there were no bad vibes on the set, and we were friendly. I like her a lot because she's very sweet. Once in a while we call up each other, but we are not like Siamese twins. So all that camaraderie that the media portrayed between us was all bullshit. We just worked well together. We had great screen chemistry, and now I have developed that same screen chemistry with Mahima and Rekhaji. You see Mahima and me together in our new film Dil Hai Tumhara ......my God, we are good together. I like Mahima. She's got a nice spirit, you know. She's not a filmi girl. She's boarding school product like me, so you can really chat with about a lot of things."
S For Shahrukh Khan
"There are certain things you can't explain. I can't explain the Shah Rukh factor. I think it was in our destiny not to work together after Dil Se. So we don't. Yes, there were some bad vibes created between Shah Rukh and me. But, we sorted it out at some stage. Someone went and told him that I'd said he likes me, and he wondered why I had said that. I denied saying having said t. We even confronted that person after which this person apologized. That was the end of the story. But, after that we never connected. After Dil Se I haven't even met him that often. We've probably met about three-four times? I've seen him at award functions seated 20 seats away, but we've never crossed each other, we've never stood next to each other , we've never talked, we've never met. The only time I met him was at the Phir Bhi Dil Hai Hindustani premiere. And that was like, 'Hi, how are you?' That's it."
T For Temper Tantrums
"I don't throw temper tantrums, but there are times when I do get a bit irritable. It's when I go through PMS (pre-menstrual stress), when I am working for long hours. Then I am like, 'Please, let's pack up now, it's midnight, yo utold me we'd pack up early, I want to go home.' So it's nothing major."
V For Vanity
"The only vanity I have is my vanity case - it's pretty big and full of make-up. Other than that, I don't understand the concept (ha, ha, ha)."
X for X-Boyfriends
"Only once. I hope he's hapy today and I hope he does well in life. We are friends today because there was no bitterness when we parted."
Y for Yesterday
"I believe in one thing - yesterday is the past, tomorrow is the future, today is a gift, that's why we call it the present."
Z for Zodiac
"I'm an Aquarian and my life is full of Aquarians. My dog is an Aquarian, two of my best friends are Aquarians, my relationship when I had one, he was an Aquarian... God, half the people around me are Aquarians!
I don't know if it's an Aquarian trait, but a lot of times, I am spaced out, and people ask me, 'Are you drunk?' I just say, 'No, I am quiet.' Sometimes yes, like a typical Aquarian, I am very opionionated. I have my set ways of thinking. Like, irrespective of who you are, I firmly believe that you have to respect a woman. However rich or cool or sexy you may be, you have to have basic manners. However well-kept or beautiful a house may be, it has to have a clean toilet, a clean kitchen. These are things I am very particular about. I guess, like most Aquarians, I have a fetish for cleanliness. I also believe, live life like a warrior. Walk straight with your head on your shoulders. That's the way I am."
